Thanksgiving in my Family

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday. Most people like Thanksgiving because of the food, of course, but I don't eat any of the holiday staples, so it has to be something else, right?

It's the traditions and memories.

My Thanksgiving starts with making my vegetarian food in the morning. Last year, it was Middle Eastern fare, and tomorrow will not be too different. Seems to be my new tradition.

The parade is on in the background and I am waiting to see any Muppets or Sesame Street characters (mainly, my beloved Oscar) or a performance from Spamalot (which is closing in January, so probably won't be a part of it this year).

Then I watch the National Dog Show, looking for the Schipperke (pronounced "Skipperkey"). There aren't many dogs like mine 'round these parts, so whenever I get to see one, it's cool. Last year, the Schip placed second in the Non-Sporting Group, so I received lots of excited phone calls. "Bailey almost won!"

Apart from my little traditions, my love for Thanksgiving revolves around the memories. My family (mom's side) gets together at my Aunt Carol's in Wickliffe every year. We have the best Thanksgiving in-jokes, guaranteed to make us laugh year after year. It's also fun & games day. We eat, we play board games.

Gramp carves the turkey

The good-natured teasing starts early:

The Pumkin Pie
We tease my Uncle Al mercilessly about pumpkin pie. He can't stand the stuff! When he was dating my Aunt Carol - (almost 30 yrs ago), my Gram cut him a huge piece and he choked it down - gagging the whole time. All to impress the future in-laws. Now that's love!

The Turkey I am offered the platter of turkey many times - ha ha >:P
The usual suspects are Uncle Al and Gramp. I have been a vegetarian since grade school. Get with the program, people!

The Deviled Eggs
We double and triple check that my aunt put out the deviled eggs. She forgot to put them on the table one year (really was funnier than it sounds!) and it's a running joke now. Sometimes it even gets mentioned on other holidays.

Saying Grace
My uncle says grace - nothing elaborate, just a quick heartfelt blessing. My brother and I try not to laugh. We are not terribly close....until that 30 seconds every year. It's completely unfunny, but we're both beet red, ready to explode. It's bad. We're going to hell.

Lee Harvey Oswald
We were having a discussion one year at Thanksgiving dinner about the Kennedy assassination, which happened really close to Thanksgiving. I believe my dad was home from the service at the time, and watching the coverage with my grandpa. When Oswald was shot live on TV, my grandpa exclaimed "That son of a bitch shot Oswald!" We had never heard that story before for some reason, and it was the funniest thing ever.

Mr. Ponti
This story still makes my stomach hurt from the laughter. My aunt was out taking a walk - I think it was on election day one year. Some lonely old lady was out in her yard and started talking to my aunt. My aunt felt bad for her, so stood there and let the old lady talk. The next thing she knew, she was invited in to meet Mr. Ponti, because he liked meeting new people.

My aunt went in for some reason, with her eyes darting around looking for a weapon in the house she could use in case someone came out and attacked her - she didn't know who this lady was or who Mr. Ponti was. Turns out, Mr. Ponti was a turtle that the lady talked to like it was a person. It was out of character for my aunt to go into a stranger's house, but totally worth it for the crazy story.

The Games
In recent years, we've played Balderdash and Cranium. My mom calls the former "Bangladesh" and retires to the bathroom with pen and paper when she can't think of an answer.

(In mom's world, George Harrison had a Concert for Balderdash.)

In the past several months, our official game has become Apples to Apples, but I will admit my favorite is Pictionary because I am more artistically-inclined than the rest of my family. And I really like to win!

***

This year, Gramp has had a lot of minor problems, which because of his age, have left him going in and out of the hospital. He went in again on Sunday for what could just be the flu. We're not sure if he will be released today. My brother was injured a few weeks back and still in severe pain, so Thanksgiving won't be what it usually is, but it sure was fun reliving the memories.

I'll let you know if any goofy new traditions or crazy stories happen tomorrow....

How Paranoid am I?

Sorry to everyone who has complained that my blog hasn't been updated in, like, forever. There is a good reason. The creative juices have been flowing in other directions. Namely toward my book. Being smart and clever takes a lot out of me and leaves me with scraps for my blog. Plus, I'm not getting out to as many interesting places or seeing interesting people (waaa!), so I'm utterly boring right now. Feel free to read past posts to see how fun I used to be :P

Onto today's topic:
I've often wanted to mention this, because it's such a bizarre idiosyncracy. It formed without my being aware of it for a very long time, and it freaked me out when I finally noticed it. I wonder if anyone else shares it. My guess is: probably not.

I won't look at anyone who is dead on TV or in a photo before I go to sleep. For instance, I read a lot about true crime and forensics books before bed (which oddly enough, helps me sleep). But if there are crime scene photos in my book, I will make sure that I look at someone who is currently alive on TV or in a photo before turning off the light and going to sleep. Doesn't matter if it's Paris Hilton or Wilford Brimley.

A couple of nights ago, I was up in the middle of the night watching infommercials. I was watching the one for Dean Martin's Celebrity Roasts. Now, 95% of the people in that infommercial are dead. Dino, Frank, Sammy, Lucy, Uncle Miltie, etc. I had to wait for Don Rickles to come on (he's still alive, right?) before I could safely turn it off and return to bed.

This may stem from the fact that I used to watch the HBO show Autopsy late at night years ago and it would freak me out so much (I mean, they showed all the uncensored gore) that I couldn't sleep or would have crazy dreams.

So now I'm paying for my morbid fascination with this weird nightly ritual.

Another part of me I can blame is my art history background. Many ancient peoples believed that a part of a person's soul lived in any image of that person. I know it's crazy, but I think I internalized some of that without being aware of it.

Lots of people have strange rituals and beliefs around death. It's one aspect of being human. I'm sure I'm not the only one...