I heart my Crest Spinbrush

Having been sick lately for much longer than I am used to, I took my sick self out to Target yesterday for more meds and shuffled around the store like an old lady for about half an hour.

(Man, when I get sick, I look sicker than any other person in history. This I swear.)

I ended up buying a Crest Spinbrush. Let me tell you - it is amazing!! I have brushed my teeth about 5 times in the last 16 hours.

I have soft teeth, which means I am prone to cavities. I also have survived three TMJ surgeries, so trips to the dentist are incredibly uncomfortable and even painful. So cavities are not something I want.

I have to brush like a crazy person to keep the cavity creeps away (remember that Family Guy episode?!). But I think this brush is going to help cut my brushing time down. And anything that saves me time, I looove.

Plus my teeth really feel clean, which I also love.

Yay Spinbrush!

(Sorry - I've been wrapped up in my furry blanket in front of the TV for the last 3 days with only a BlackBerry to keep in touch with the world. A vibrating toothbrush is super exciting to me at this point.)

Revisiting the MBTI

Recently, I retook the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator.

This is such a great tool for figuring out who you really are - especially if you're confused most of the time like I am.

Have you ever taken it? What's your type?

According to research, my type, ENTJ is 2-5% of the population (depending on where you look), and have the highest median income. Interesting....

It's fascinating stuff if you haven't looked into it before. I go back to it every couple of years to refresh my mind and remember that there ARE other people out there like me. I just don't think I know any of them. (And I probably should be glad I don't!)

Dissed at the Discount Store

I had to run out to the discount stores in my area tonight looking for some Halloween stuff. Let me just say, it was a rather weird evening.

Target was fine. Got my stuff and left.

Went to the register with my one item at Wal Mart and the cashier never acknowledged me and never stopped her conversation with another cashier who was standing with her. I was lucky she swiped my item. I asked her to hit credit on the register after I swiped my card and she stood there, deep in conversation until she realized she needed to do something.

I barely got my receipt from her and she didn't even bother to make sure I could get to my bag. It was really bizarre. I said thanks very rudely and left (I know I went down to her level, but I was pissed!). I have never been completely ignored like that anywhere! I mean, I know cashiers don't necessarily want to be there on a Saturday night, but can usually muster a semi-pleasant "hi."

Then, I saw a couple making out behind a pole in the candle aisle at K-Mart. When they realized I wasn't going anywhere (hey, there were chocolate candles to sniff), they finally moved out of the area. Then I saw them making out in the parking lot. Not in their car, mind you.

Eww.

I hate discount stores, but they're a necessary evil sometimes.

Hangin' around in the middle of the night

Greetings from almost 3am. I can't sleep. I have an early day of shopping tomorrow and I should have long been asleep. But one thing is keeping me awake:

Hangers.

I get to go into some of the nicest closets around, but if I see one more closet filled with Joan Crawford's wire hangers and/or twenty different colors and shapes of plastic hangers, I think I am going to scream. Or grab one and hit someone with it.

I'm not a neat freak, and I don't have OCD or anything, but it makes me absolutely crazy to see people disrespecting their clothes and contributing to general closet disarray when it's so easy to avoid.

From my experience, the first step toward having a messy closet is the hangers. If they're all different colors, shapes and sizes, it instantly makes your closet look disorganized. Even if you *are* a neatnik and everything is perfectly organized, the hangers can completely ruin the effect.

No matter how big or how small - or whether it's a shared space or all your own, going into your closet in the morning should be a pleasant experience. The rest of our lives are stressful enough!

I recommend to everyone that they purchase crystal hangers. Because they are a uniform size and clear, they pretty much disappear so all you see are your clothes. It's like your closet becomes your own little clothing boutique. It's easier to see what you have and put outfits together.

I'll write more about clothing organization soon, since it's on my mind.

Check out the classic Closet Monkeys article to see the crystal hangers I recommend.

KK on the Q

Got to talk about fun fall fashion yesterday morning on Wilde & Fee on Q104! I've never done radio before, so I was a little anxious. Turns out it is totally fun. I had the best time!!

I am most proud that I got to mention Prince (thanks to the purple trend) and The Fonz (because I felt like I was dressed like him!).

Here's me flanked by Allan Fee and Rebecca Wilde!
(Is it me or does my head look really small?)

Fall Fashion Trends 2008

Hey gang - my Blogger has been acting weird for a couple of days - I will correct this when it's acting normal again.

Fall is my favorite season for fashion. Why? Because spring and summer fashion always seems to go together, so it’s basically six months of the same thing. But fall always throws us a curve. The colors change, the fabrics get heavier, and the interesting textures come out to play!

Whether you are shopping in the stores or in your own closet, here is some stylish inspiration!

1) Fall is usually known for its colors – pumpkin, dark yellow, rusts and warm dark greens. This year, we’re being thrown a big curve. Purple is everywhere, in case you haven’t noticed. The great thing about purple is that there are so many shades that there is a purple that looks good on everyone – from lavender to deep plum. To look really chic this season, pair it with fall’s hottest neutral, gray.

And if you aren’t partial to purple, try one of its relatives, wine, berry or fuchsia, which are also around for the season. Top from Nordstrom

2) While spring and summer are known for florals in feminine skirts and dresses, they are also spilling over into fall. This time, though, the palettes are deeper and richer with less contrast, like in this skirt from Macy’s.

3) A lot of women have been complaining about skinny jeans for the past couple of years. If you go to New York, you see them everywhere, but they never really caught on around here because they just don’t work well for most “real” women. Luckily, the fashion gods have given us wide-leg jeans for fall. These tend to be more flattering on most bodies, and they’re more comfortable too. They can be dressed up, like a trouser, or dressed down and worn in a very relaxed manner. As always, the darker the denim, the more formal it is.

Wide-leg trousers from 7 for All Mankind

4) Out of nowhere came 1970’s prints for the season. Yes, the crazy patterns my mom was wearing in my baby pictures are back in vogue and I can hardly believe it! Of course, they’re being worn in more contemporary silhouettes, like contemporary wrap or empire-waist dresses. If you’re partial to a Bohemian sort of vibe, you will love these patterns!

Check out this dress from Candie’s for Kohl’s.

5) Another fashion item that has entered the 1970’s time warp is the cuff bracelet. These look great on women with long arms. Don’t have long arms? Simply choose a bracelet size that is proportional to your arm length and wrist size. Part of my job is to help you flaunt the parts of your body that you love, but also navigate around the areas that are more of a challenge to make them look more fabulous. Bracelet from Forever 21

6) The wild black and white herringbone pattern that was really popular last year has morphed into a more subtle black and white with less contrast and smaller patterns. This more conservative look is so elegant in jackets and coats if you’re professional woman and tired of the old back or gray options. It’s a great investment piece. I also love this for suits!

Coat from Nordstrom

7) A lot of women live in their boots from the onset of cold weather to spring. There is a dizzying array of cute ankle boots out there right now. But I think the look of the moment is the tall, flat boot. We’re going to be seeing this everywhere. It’s not going to overtake the high heel boot anytime soon, but it’s a more casual and comfortable option.

Boot from BCBGirls

Honorable mention:

Ruffled blouses

Colorful, oversize bags

Patterned tights

Runway Trends:

One shoulder asymmetrical dresses

Mix & match plaid

Heavily structured garments

Minimalism

PETA, You Are Idiots

A PETA protest took place on Public Square yesterday. Two chicks "showering" to somehow show that it takes a whole lot of water to process one pound of meat.


I don't get it. Is this supposed to make people not want to eat meat?? How?

I am a vegetarian. And I am definitely for the ethical treatment of ALL animals.

But I REALLLLY despise PETA.

These publicity stunts are ridiculous and accomplish nothing.

In fact, their antics make me want to eat meat simply out of principle.

I've heard that PETA members taste just like chicken. Any of my carnivore friends want to give it a go?


Photo courtesy of WTAM.com

If you call me....

...about engaging my assistance in helping your image consulting business, please don't do this:

Tell me you are also an image consultant and invite me to come to you to let you pick my brain about my business.

No, ma'am. That is not how it works.

Over the past few years, I have become more and more prominent in my line of work, especially in this area. I know that it seems like a glamorous profession, and I can see why a lot of people are interested in it.

But you would not believe how brash and self-serving some people are in contacting me just so that I can tell them how I succeeded.

It's not that I am selfish or keeping it all to myself. I have a specific forum where I share and help others in my industry. I cannot understand why people have the audacity to expect that I would make a special trip and waste my time so that I can help them, when in essence, they would be competing with my business.

The call I just received really annoyed me. Like several others who have reached out to me, the sense of expectation and entitlement was unbelievable.

This is quite different from the people who contact me as the local president of the Image Consultants Association (AICI), where it is my job to promote the organization, increase membership and provide education opportunities to our members. The problem is that a lot of people want something for nothing - no effort, no cost. I invited this young woman to our meeting on 9/21 and she pretty much ignored me.

When I first started to become successful, I actually did meet with people so they could ask me questions. I did way too much of that. It stopped when someone met with me and told me how she would do what I do, except how she would do it better. Okay, good luck then. I have no idea what happened to her.

The best I can do is point everyone to our AICI meetings and continue to share my knowledge and experience at our events.

Ugh.

Why I'm looking forward to Fall

SUMMER	FALL
Shorts & Capris	Dark Jeans - it's easier to look taller!
Pale nails and French manicures, Hot pink toes	Dark brown & burgundy polish (even on my fingernails)
Bright colors	More interesting colors (I'm going to put burgundy and lime together - and it's gonna be awesome!)
Flip flops & Sandals	Boots!
Bare legs	Tights and fishnets - whoo hoo! (which reminds me - I watch Rocky Horror once a year and it's at the end of October!)
Beach blonde	Darker lowlights
Tees and tanks	Cute corduroy jackets
Self-tanner	More self-tanner!
No holidays I really like	My fave holidays - Halloween & Thanksgiving!
And most importantly.....cooler weather! I am not a fan of the cold and snow, but give me a crisp Fall day driving around listening to the Browns game and I am in heaven!

KK: Shoe Pundit

Let them have their political discourse...

and I will provide the shoe commentary!

I don't normally discuss politics in my little blog, but I wanted to mention that my philosophy is to check out the shoes first, ask questions later.

And I was quite impressed by Sarah Palin. Why? Because I liked her shoes.

I looked at her feet this past Friday and saw not a boring pair of black pumps, which is what I totally expected, but a pair of sexy red peeptoes. And you can't wear peeptoes with hosiery, so that means she tossed aside the pantyhose as well. (Women around the country, you may cheer now - this may have been one of the first steps to finally getting rid of the bain of our existence.)


So I decided to see if McCain's running mate was a bit of a shoe maverick as well. And it appears that she is....

Not sure PETA would approve of the bear (or the crab), but I dig the shoes. I mean, a governor looking all business on top and then wearing red flip-flops?

New Alaska quarter? Check. Sexy boots? Check. (I think the jacket is awful though.) Hey, there's that bear again!

And no, I am not voting for anyone's feet, but as a fashion commentator, I needed to mention that I am impressed by her shoes. It's not what Laura Bush would wear. And that's a good thing!

Tonight when she accepts the nomination for VP, I will be tuning in. For the footwear.

***

BTW, I have heard of her referred to as both a VPILF (thanks, Campinelli!) and McCain's trophy VP. To me, she just looks like Tina Fey.

!!! I HATE SCHOOL !!!

Okay, this column was supposed to be written last week, so you're going to get an abbreviated version of it. Maybe next year, you'll get the whole story.

I didn't just hate school when I was a kid. I still hate school with a fiery passion even though I last stepped foot in a classroom as a student over 12 years ago. I feel such pity for kids when they have to go back to school. When I was a kid, the end of August was met with such dread that words cannot describe it. But instead of empathizing with their pain, I actually feel like pointing and laughing at the kids in the school supplies aisle "Ha Ha - You have to go back to school and I don't!" Cruel, I know. It's passion, I tell ya!

My parents, thinking they were doing me a favor, sent me to Catholic school for K-8. I'm convinced that my feelings for school were formed from that experience.

I was at a little party the other day and was doing makeup on a third grader named Kayley. I asked her if she liked school. She said she definitely did not! Good answer!

I told her that he greatest thing I learned in third grade was:

Do not brush my hair in Miss Cafarelli's class.

I was actually yelled at for quickly taking out my brush and running it through my long hair, which tended to tangle. Not during class, mind you. During a break. But Miss Cafarelli, at about 30 years old, wore a wig, and I don't think it was for medical reasons. So I think she was jealous.

I went to public high school, where I actually learned some stuff, like how to say "whale" and "shark" in French, how hot young Robert Redford was in The Great Gatsby, and just how bad I am at math.

Then came college. The horror of horrors in my school life. I still have a recurring nightmare about college - it's time to take the final and I realized that I never went to the class. I still sometimes don't believe that I have a diploma! Here's what I learned in college:

- More than I ever wanted to know about the script for Raiders of the Lost Ark (we studied it for a whole semester in a screenwriting class - awesome!)

- The weird idiosyncrasies of the WKYC on-air talent when my professor was working there

- Just how gross dissecting a fetal pig can be (note: VERY GROSS)

- My Gothic and Northern Renaissance art history professor liked to reference paintings' and statues' "naughty bits." His classes were hella boring, but I tolerated him better with the Monty Python references.

- And oddly, I learned how the kidneys work (Na+ and K+ balance), which I've needed to explain numerous times when people in my family have had blood pressure issues. Makes me sound smart. But not really.

Oh, and I also wrote a sitcom based on Othello (yes! Othello the Sitcom!) that featured Ted Turner and Jane Fonda, the Home & Garden Channel, and Wisconsin Badgers boxer shorts. I HAVE to find that script!

Too bad the rest of it sucked big time.


Anyway, next year when the end of summer nauseous school feelings come back again, I will give more details....there's a lot more where that came from!!!

RIP - Jerry Reed

I just heard the Smokey and the Bandit music and then learned Jerry Reed passed away at 71 due to complications from emphysema.

I have a few good memories of him. I'll bet anyone who is around my age can identify with all of these:

Of course, Snowman in the Smokey movies.

Coach Red Beaulieu in The Waterboy

Extra Credit:
And an episode of Scooby Doo - The Phantom of the Country Music Hall. Remember it? No one could find him - they could hear him singing because he was locked up in the basement.